Kids these days! They think they’ve got it all figured out, their self-esteem–for no good reason–is through the roof, and they get trophies just for showing up.
You hear this stuff almost everywhere, from casual conversations to the newspaper op-ed pages. A new book argues that this conventional wisdom about kids and parenting isn’t just misguided or inaccurate; it forms a worldview reinforces and recommends a specific, deeply conservative, political ideology.
FAIR spoke with Alfie Kohn, author of the book The Myth of the Spoiled Child: Challenging the Conventional Wisdom About Children and Parenting, on the April 11 episode of CounterSpin.
I would argue that all of the “kids need more grit” positions are back in vogue because the “positive parenting” movement of the late 80s has turned out soft, entitled, problematic adults. I beg to differ with the opinion that every media outlet touts tough parenting. Conversely I couldn’t fine any mainstream parenting resources that advocate strict parenting, and my kids are still very young. According to Parent Magazine every month, all you need to do is praise praise praise your little dumpling and ignore anything wrong they do and your child will magically grow up with sparkly self esteem. It’s been a very detrimental trend, and now people are realizing more grit and less self-centeredness would be nice. We’ve all seen the difference between spoiled and unspoiled people.
I agreed with much of what Mr Kohn said, but he does leave out the children who are raised with an enormous sense of entitlement. It takes work to raise children, a lot of work, and many people who have children are not prepared to put much effort into it. What children need is attention and preparation, which they do not get from computers, television, and shopping. I don’t believe in praising children for just being themselves; I believe in loving them for being themselves and praising them for mastering their environment.
The trouble with kids these days is simple.They DO have a entitlement belief ,but that is not the problem.The problem is it does not match reality.We(those of us in the generations ahead of them) have spent our piggie banks.Our parents piggie banks.And our kids as well.They can not get where we are- with the same amount of effort we used to get here.They have to do much more.Because we started them in massive debt.It is a matter of teaching your kids that the future will be about downsizing.I believe in a bigger and better America.Not a smaller and less.But the voters have spoken.The goalposts have moved.We may have to prepare them that their future has been brokered by government madness.